Have you ever seen a movie and asked yourself, “How did this get made?” For independent films, I think it’s a bit different. Usually, in those cases, it’s friends and filmmakers coming together to produce something out of the sheer passion for the medium. That, to me at least, is something completely different. I want to be completely clear and say I’m asking this question in regards to big budget studios, respectable actors, and admirable directors. There is a distinct difference between something like The Room with a budget of 6 million dollars and Catwoman, with a 100 million dollar budget and Academy Award winning lead.

Sure, not every movie is gonna be a slam dunk. As a film fan, I know that I understand that, and I’ve come to grips with that. Bad movies still baffle me sometimes, as does the movie I’m writing about: Valley of the Gods. The movie tells the story of an eccentric billionaire (or as he’s noted in the movie, the world’s richest man, played by John Malkovich) who is attempting to buy the sacred Valley of the Gods from Native Americans, the Navajo people, all in an attempt to harness a new energy source. My biggest problem with this movie is the plot that I just summarized for you - that’s barely scratching the surface of the film. It is just the basic thread of the plot of the film. 

To say that Valley is a busy movie would be a massive understatement. There is so much going on in this film. Writer-director Lech Majewski does attempt to bring them all together but fails spectacularly. Outside of the main plot, viewers are interested in the Native Americans who are fighting for their land. This could have been a fascinating plot point to watch unfold. But that arc literally goes nowhere, unfortunately. Where the Navajo people do end up going by the film’s ending is completely out of tone, weird, and pointless. Another major arc throughout is that of John Ecas - a gentleman who is separated from his wife and works in marketing. I mean, I guess, because this movie has no sense of time. 

Anyways, he quits his job to write shirtless in the Valley of the Gods and somehow meets up with Malkovich. Again, this movie is constantly busy but never has anything to show for it. To make matters worse, Valley attempts to tell its narrative through three separate parties. I have no problem with stories like that - as long as you make proper use of them and don’t waste it. Malkovich is never developed, Harnett is devoid of purpose, and the third arc in Bérénice Marlohe isn’t introduced until halfway through the film. Even when she is introduced, she has nothing to do. She shows up to basically be arm candy for Malkovich, and nothing outside of that. 

I will give points to Majewski for creativity. The film is split up into chapters, which helps give the film a unique voice. That voice is muted by everything going on within those chapters. Not just with the character arcs but also what’s happening visually. The green screen visuals are unbearable from start to finish. It feels like nearly every shot is set up against a green screen, and not for special effects - just because they can. That may be, perhaps, one of the most frustrating things about this movie. The dumbest things are created using CGI in this movie. For example, there is a party scene in the third act. The people behind Harnett are clearly computer-generated. What is the actual purpose of this? The chapter set up and bad CGI makes this movie feel like an anthology of student films.

Overall, Valley of the Gods might boast a star-studded cast but the stars are dimmed heavily for this one. While the movie might have a creative setup, it does nothing with it. Valley is broken up into several chapters that provide an interesting concept but hinder the story more than anything, filling it with arcs that go nowhere or divert completely from their original purpose. An overcrowded, empty two hours of movie. To call this movie a waste of time still wouldn’t do it justice. Valley of the Gods wastes its talent and its viewer’s time. 

RORSCHACH RATING:

If you or someone you know is reading this right now and you are struggling with suicide, depression, addiction, or self-harm - please reach out. Comment, message or tweet to us. Go to victimsandvillains.net/hope for more resources. Call the suicide lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Text "HELP" to 741-741. There is hope & you DO have so much value and worth!

Victims and Villains is written Josh "Captain Nostalgia" Burkey (and produced by), Caless Davis, Dan Rockwood, & Brandon Miller. Music by Mallory Johnson and others. This post was edited by Cam Smith. Valley of the Gods is property of Well Go USA. We do not own nor claim any rights. Valley of the Gods is available on Blu-Ray, DVD and all major digital platforms August 11th, 2020. Click here for more information.

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